Fantasy is retreating into unrealistic dreams or expectations as a way out of real problems. It’s like someone said about why so many lower income people vote against tax reform: “They expect to win the lottery and when they do, they don’t want the government to get the money.”
The addicted person waiting for his settlement from an accident, the gambler putting off help because he ‘just knows’ he’s going to win big on the Giants game tonight… these are examples of fantasy at work.
In addiction literature, fantasy is defined as: “Taking refuge in unreality to avoid facing facts.”
Examples:
- “I’m going to be a big star someday, and all this will be forgotten.”
- “Once I get back with my wife, everything will be fine.”
- “I’m getting a lot of money from my lawsuit, that will solve all my problems.”
Result: How can you change your life without seeing it for what it is?
How we answer it: Keep pointing out the facts.
How it ends: Eventually, the fantasy bubble gets popped, and the addicted person realizes they’ve wasted a lot of time when they could have been making real progress.
Previous: Defense: Intellectualizing
